Wanted?

Do you have trouble understanding your partner? Does your partner have communication issues? Do you?

Does your partner ever pretend like you don’t exist? When you call your partner by name, in the sweetest voice you can, does your partner come to you? When you touch your partner, do you expect anything in return? Do you ever get anything in return? Are you still cuddling together, or has most of the intimacy tapered off lately? Is there something you need that your partner seems incapable of giving?

Have you been feeding your partner the same food for the past five years?

Do you often leave your partner at home alone all day? Does your partner ignore you when you come home? When you come home, do you ever find the house in a state of disarray? When you ask your partner what happened, do you get a response? Does your partner just sit there and watch you clean the mess all by yourself? Does that make you angry? Does your partner know you get angry or do you hide your emotions from your partner?

Do you ever feel afraid of your partner? Have you been lying awake at night, trying to sort through the arguments you’ve had with your partner? Do you worry your partner might try to hurt you in your sleep? Have you been sleeping with one eye open? How long has this been going on? Have you been developing a deeply rooted hatred for animals? Do you need a break? Have you ever tried to end things? Do you want help? I can help.

Call my office: 1-800-CAT-CALL

If this is an EMERGENCY, call my Cell: 911-CAT-HELP

Sincerely,

Mittens “Mitt” Roflmao

Professional Cat Whisperer