Having Said That…

…you’ve come a long way since your freak boating incident.

…maybe you don’t need Al-Anon this week.

…you’re going to need a lawyer for this one.

…maybe you should see a doctor too.

…we’re all winners, in a way.

…there’s always next time.

…you might want start looking for a new job.

…being in debt can be constructive.

…I’m going to need you to pay this time.

…you look great tonight.

…you do look good in baggy jeans.

…you don’t sound like you’re from Newark.

…Newark can be nice in the fall.

…you might make it in Hollywood, but—

…I also think you’d do well in the Midwest.

…you should totally move back in with your parents.

…I still like your parents.

…I’m not trying to embarrass you or your parents.

…I really don’t like your siblings.

…I just can’t afford to be seen with your family anymore.

…it’s fine if you need more time to heal or breathe or whatever.

…you’re probably still feeling symptoms from the freak boating incident.

…we can still be friends.


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